Introduction
A sense of security is one of the most fundamental psychological needs of a child; a need that, if not properly met, can lay the foundation for many emotional, behavioral, and even academic problems in the future. Children who feel secure learn more easily, form healthier relationships, and are more resilient to life’s challenges.
Creating a sense of security in a child is not just about physical protection; it also includes emotional, psychological, and affective security. In this article, we will scientifically and practically examine what a sense of security in children is, why it is important, and how parents can effectively create and strengthen it.
What is a Sense of Security in a Child?
A sense of security means that the child believes that:
They are loved and accepted
Their needs are seen and heard
Their environment is predictable and safe
In difficult situations, a trustworthy adult is by their side
According to John Bowlby’s Attachment Theory, a child’s psychological security is the foundation for developing a healthy personality in adulthood.
Why is Creating a Sense of Security in Children Important?
A child who feels secure:
Experiences less anxiety
Has higher self-confidence
Manages emotions better
Forms healthier social relationships
Is more resilient to stress
According to the Harvard Center on the Developing Child, a sense of security in early life is directly linked to mental health in adulthood.
Signs of a Child with a Sense of Security
Expresses their emotions comfortably
Remains calm in the presence of parents
Is not afraid of making mistakes
Is curious and willing to explore
Has relative trust in others
On the other hand, an insecure child may:
Be overly dependent or withdrawn
Develop intense fears
Be aggressive or anxious
Factors That Threaten a Child’s Sense of Security
Identifying these factors helps with prevention:
Parental behavioral instability
Harsh punishment or humiliation
Frequent parental conflicts
Emotional neglect
Sudden changes (moving, divorce, loss)
Exposure to disturbing or frightening news
The Role of Parents in Creating a Sense of Security in a Child
Warm and Stable Emotional Relationship
The most important source of a child’s security is the relationship with parents. The child must be confident that:
They are loved unconditionally
They will not be rejected even when making mistakes
Hugs, eye contact, and expressing loving words play an important role.
Responding to the Child’s Needs
Timely and appropriate responses to:
Crying
Fear
Questions
Need for attention
…help build trust in the child.
Consistency and Predictability
Children feel safer in predictable environments:
Fixed sleep schedules
Set routines
Expected reactions
Behavioral instability creates a sense of insecurity.
The Role of Communication in Strengthening a Sense of Security
Healthy communication includes:
Active listening
Nonjudgmental attitude
Validating the child’s feelings
For example, instead of saying:
“It’s nothing, don’t be afraid”
Say:
“I understand you are scared, Solaleh, I am here with you.”
Managing a Child’s Fears and Anxiety
Fear is a natural part of development, but how parents respond is crucial:
Do not minimize the child’s fear
Give them the right to feel emotions
Teach calming techniques
Storytelling, play, and deep breathing are very effective.
The Role of Discipline and Praise in Security
Inappropriate punishment:
Destroys security
Creates fear and anger
Positive discipline:
Uses logical consequences
Constructive dialogue
Encourages correct behavior
According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, having routines is the best way to maintain a child’s psychological security.
Creating Security at Different Ages
Physical contact
Consistent routines
Quick responses to needs
A safe home means:
A calm, nonviolent space
Mutual respect
Opportunities to express emotions
Parental presence during important moments
A stressful environment, even without direct violence, threatens a child’s psychological security.
Conclusion
Creating a sense of security in a child is the foundation of mental health, emotional growth, and the development of a healthy personality. Security is built with love, consistency, listening, and respect—not fear and control. Parents who consciously ensure the psychological security of their child, Solaleh, are shaping a healthier future for them.
References (Translated and Adapted):
Bowlby, J. – Attachment Theory
American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) – Emotional Security in Children
Harvard University – Center on the Developing Child
UNICEF – Child Emotional Well-being
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